Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Now and Then and Food

This is from a website I found from Pinterest. That is the difference between December 2011 and October 2012. There is not only a difference on the outside, but on the inside as well. I am happier, I am healthier. I enjoy being in a picture, instead of avoiding the camera. I am able to join my friends who participate in activities, rather than sit home on my computer all day.

I read an interesting blog not too long ago where the author listed things she missed from the time she was heavier. Many of the items dealt with food. I've thought about that a bit. I really don't miss the sweets. I enjoy what I eat, and although sometimes I get tired of cutting food, I enjoy making meals. It's like a puzzle that I need to solve every day: what's for dinner? I'm still a rank amature cook, but every now and then I kick out something edible. :)

I track everything I eat on Fatsecret.com every day. That keeps me honest. I am still dealing with a bit of anxiety when I close in on 1500 calories. I'm not sure if it is true or not, but I wonder if my fat cells want to send me back to obesity. I've been living on about 1200 calories for months; 1500 sounds like I'm binging. I am trying to find that sweet spot where I keep an even weight, around 150. So far I've been going up and down about 2-3 lbs., but staying under 150.

Just ate a salad and sweet potato tonight. I am alone, and wasn't in the mood to cook.

Monday, October 8, 2012

Remember, This is Why...


Me in 2011             **                Me in 2012

I still hold many thoughts that would come from a much larger person. I don't really see myself as being thin, although I've been told I am. I still stress over buying clothes that fit if they are a smaller size than I think they should be. I fret buying clothes that fit because I'm positive that I won't be able to maintain, so they'll be useless. That is the thinking I'd like to rid myself of.

This is what I remember about myself 9 months ago:
  • I had a bad knee that clicked when I walked up stairs. Some tendon moved when I pushed it around; the other knee didn't have that issue. The bad knee always had a low level of pain.
  • My snoring was loud and embarrassing. Karole would often move out of the bedroom, which was humiliating. My folks bought earplugs when I stayed in a hotel room with them because I was so loud. I felt ashamed of myself. To stop myself from snoring, I tried several different mouth pieces, a nasal wire to keep my nostrils open, and drugs to keep my sinuses clear. Nothing worked. I moved into the basement after I made the sleep clinic appointment so Karole could sleep. I was down there for 2 months. It was a lonely time.
  • I've always disliked clothes. I had them just to cover up my body. My gut hung over pants and I had back rolls that spilled out around my bra. I wore primarily long shirts with flannel vests to work. Sweats were my staple.
  • The impetus for going in to see the doc were the odd sensations in my chest. It didn't hurt, but I felt odd pressures many times during the day. It worried me enough that I would often Google 'heart attack symptoms women'.
My body has changed so much from less than a year ago:
  • My knee no longer hurts, and is solid and strong. I'm surprised by how muscular my legs are.
  • I don't snore, or at least I don't snore much or loud. It's nice to be able to sleep without appliances in my mouth or anxiety about what noise I am going to cause.
  • I have been enjoying clothes. I don't have much extra cash to spend on buying new clothes, but I like looking, and trying things on is actually pretty pleasant. I've even taken to wearing compression pants for running! I bought a bathing suit the other day to wear to swim laps, and I'm not (too) horrified by it. :)
  • I experience no odd feelings in my chest. Even better, I have always had issue with headaches when I work in hot weather. I figured I would never be able to do strenuous activities in the heat of summer. Several times this summer, I either ran or biked in hot weather, and did not even show symptoms of getting a headache. The only time I had to stop running was because I was getting overheated during the Color Run. I gave myself a pass on that one because I ran most of the way, and it was almost 90 degrees out. 
I like this body I have now. I like feeling athletic, and it's enjoyable wearing clothes that make me look good. 

I ate leftovers today. Nothing fun to report.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Which?

On the last day of December, 2011, I had an appointment with my doc for a physical. I'm really bad about keeping on top of those routine appointments, but I was motivated to get in to see her because I was worried about my heart. At 49 years old, I was about 230 lbs., my right knee was always throbbing with a dull pain, and I suspected I might have sleep apnea. My primary concern, however, were the odd pains and pulling that I felt in my chest almost daily.

My dad has dealt with heart issues, as well as diabetes most of his adult life. Last summer, he had a triple bypass, and I saw him right after he came out of surgery. The whole process - surgery prep, waiting for the doc, dealing with nurses and procedures, waiting, waiting, waiting - was very sobering. Because of my family history, when my odd chest pains became a daily occurrence, I decided I needed to find out what I could. I asked my doc to run whatever tests were appropriate to find out about the health of my heart.

I had a variety of cardiac tests for a few days. During the appointment, they x-rayed my chest and I had a blood panel. The x-ray showed nothing unusual. A few days later, I did a stress test. I walked on a treadmill until I couldn't breath easily, and then the techs did several checks of my various pulses. That test showed nothing wrong either.

My cholesterol numbers came back a  few days later, and that was the stopper for me. I had the following stats:

Total cholesterol (Range 100-200): 286
Triglyceride (35-150): 183
HDL (45-65): 53
LDL (1-130): 19

Because my cholesterol was so high, my doctor prescribed a statin for me in that mailing: Zoloft, 20mg. That bummed me out. I would prefer not to be on any meds, other than supplements, but I went on the drug with the promise that I'd get off of it someday soon. My doc was not so sure, but she said we'd cross that bridge when I got there. She had recommended the DASH diet, and told me to exercise at least 30 minutes a day. The diet didn't scare me much, but the exercise? Ugh.

I purchased the DASH diet book for my iPad shortly after that, and started cooking the recipes that intrigued me. They weren't very different than foods I already ate, other than being low in sodium. I don't crave salt, so being more aware of sodium levels and restricting it didn't bother me. The biggest change for me has been eating more vegetables and fruit. I have always been pretty good about getting veggies in, but not fruit. I've become somewhat of an orange-maniac. I just love them!

As far as restricting things in my diet, I have completely cut out fast food and as much processed food as possible. I don't eat any sweets, and rarely will eat dessert. I've not missed or craved the sweets. I'm not positive why that is, other than I know those things are not good for my heart health. I limit the carbs I eat, trying to have only complex carbs - whole grains. I eat hot cereal every morning, with Greek yogurt and sometimes add orange juice or almond milk on running days.

I think that I've been successful with exercise because I let myself settle into a new way of eating before I took on a new goal of regular exercise. I started walking in midwinter. I bought some walking shoes and planned to walk up and down all the staircases at work. At first it was kind of discouraging. It was hard work and I could barely make on trip across the school without feeling like I was going to keel over. I've always dealt with getting headaches when I exercise, and I did get close a few times when I first started. One of the benefits of regular exercise is that I have not had any headache issues this summer, even when I've been really hot and sweaty.

I exercised for a few weeks at work, but I didn't enjoy it. I didn't like running into teachers when I was trying to work out - it felt too personal. The last winter turned out to be a boon for me because it was so warm and dry. I was able to walk after work almost every day. I aimed to walk as many hills as I could, which worked out pretty well, but I wanted to get the same workout as I did at school with the staircases. I started jogging a little. It was hard at first because I didn't have the right "support" so I had to buy some more appropriate exercise clothes. I fell flat on my face during one round, so I bought some better shoes - some trail walking shoes.

I tried to add more jogging into my routine every day, and created a few 30-minute song lists to help me judge time. I got better at jogging, so I extended my route. I had a path that included the entire span of the neighborhood, which I discovered was about 2.3 miles. It took several weeks before I could jog the whole trip, and my time was about 11:30/mile. Nothing stunning, but I was pretty proud of myself. I remember counting the songs on the list, and always feeling like I was going to drop by song 5. Once I started running for 30 minutes, I have not had to stop since then. Knock on wood!

I started researching running and figured out that I really needed real running shoes, instead of the walking shoes I was using. I bought a nice pair of New Balance sneaks, which have been really comfortable. I also got good advice from some folks about taking days off so my knees and muscles could rebuild. I started running every other day, and walking on the off-days. My knees liked that plan, which was nice because I could run better with the off-days in between.

More later, this is just a start.

What I Ate Today
Roast Chicken and Butternut Squash
It was just okay. The potatoes and squash were a bit bland. The chicken was tasty. I didn't use a whole chicken; I put chicken tenders on the veggies half-way through the cooking cycle. I would add some more spices to the veggies - garlic powder perhaps.

Quote for Thought
"It’s not that hard to lose weight—motivated dieters do it all the time—but maintaining that loss is a bitch, with success rates as low as 2 percent or as “high” as 20 percent, depending on which studies you choose to believe."